Living a lie

I feel like I have been living a lie for a long time. I am at a cross road now and I don't even know who I am any more. I am completely lost. I feel stupid and hopeless. I don't know what I want to do. I don't know whether I want to live like everyone else in the capitalisitic world or living a life with just enough things. I love BMW, but I don't to buy one because of the stupid image that associates with it. I don't want people to think I am rich. Then again, I will everything to sabotage any money making opportunity. I am not motivated by money. because Money causes plenty of stree in my family.

I don't even know what motivates me any more. My life is out of focus and I don't know what to do to refocus it.

Can some one please help me?